[00:33.22]Jabbity, jabbity, jab, jab, jab! 戳!戳!戳!
[00:33.90]Hey! Jab one more eye and it's a federaI crime. 嘿!要是再戳它眼睛,就是触犯法律!
[00:38.58]-Who are you? -EnvironmentaI Protection Agency. - 你们是谁? - 环保局(EPA)
[00:49.94]Russ CargiII, head of the EPA, here to see the president. 罗斯·卡吉尔,环保局局长,来见总统
[00:57.66]Mr. President. 总统先生
[00:58.98]Ja, that is me. 对,我就是 (施瓦辛格总统)
[01:01.66]PoIIution in SpringfieId has reached crisis IeveIs. 斯普林菲尔德的污染已经到了危急状态
[01:05.34]I hate this job. Everything's ''crisis'' this and ''end of the worId'' that. 我真讨厌这差事 不是危机,就是什么世界末日
[01:10.38]Nobody opens with a joke. I miss Danny De Vito. 就没人先说个笑话引出议题 我想念丹尼·狄·维托
[01:13.54]You want a joke, huh? Stop me if you've heard this one. 你想听笑话? 要是你听过这个的话,就阻止我讲下去
[01:18.06]Look at those angry eyes and giant teeth. 看看这些愤怒的眼睛和巨型獠牙
[01:21.90]It's Iike Christmas at the Kennedy compound. 就跟在肯尼迪家过圣诞节一样恐怖
[01:25.42]You know, sir, when you made me head of the EPA. . . 总统先生,您委任我为环保局长时…
[01:25.78]. . .you appointed one of the most successfuI men in America. . . 您将百年不遇的人才
[01:31.14]. . .to the Ieast successfuI agency in government. 低就于千年不遇的无能部门
[01:31.62]And why did I take the job? 可我为什么还是欣然接受呢?
[01:34.14]Because I'm a rich man who wanted to give something back. 因为我是个富翁,希望回馈社会
[01:36.82]Not the money, but something. 我不是指钱,而是回馈些非物质的东西
[01:40.82]So here is our chance to kick some ass2 for Mother Earth. 眼下这就是我们施展拳脚的机会
[01:43.34]-I'm Iistening. -WeII, I've narrowed your choices down. . . - 接着说 - 我已经提炼出
[01:46.02]. . .to five unthinkabIe options. …五个不可思议的议案
[01:48.70]Each wiII cause untoId misery-- 每个都有难以预计的恶果…
[01:49.86]I pick number three. 我选第三个
[01:53.70]You don't wanna read them first? 您不先读读再做决定吗?
[01:54.90]I was eIected to Iead, not to read. Number three! 我当总统是为了"领导"不是为了"读议案" 我选第三个!