[02:26.32]I mean, I don't get it! What do men want? 我是说，我不懂！男人到底要什么？
[02:28.80]A cellulite seaweed wrap, a diamond dog collar, and a karaoke machine. 一次脂肪海藻瘦身，一个钻石 狗项圈，和一台卡拉OK机怎样？
[02:31.84]Karaoke's a no. 卡拉OK就免了
[02:40.40]- Can I cancel it? - No. We'd be out of business. - 我能取消它吗？ - 不 我们会没生意的
[02:49.44]It's gonna suck. 这会很糟糕的
[02:50.16]Yes, but it always does. 是的，但总是那样子的
[02:58.04]Roses For Whatever. 无论如何玫瑰花店
[03:02.36]A thank you note? 一张感谢卡？
[03:03.72]She sent you all those gifts and you didn't call? 她送给你那么多礼物 而你竟然没打电话去？
[03:07.08]I wanna call. 我想打的
[03:11.64]Am I an idiot³? 我是个白痴吗？
[03:11.72]In general? I don't know. 一般来说吗？我不知道
[03:15.80]Love makes you crazy. You should call her. 爱使你疯狂，你应该打给她的
[03:17.40]I said horrible things to her. What do I say now? 我对她说了可怕的话 现在我该说什么？
[03:23.76]And the probability⁴ ratio of a failed relationship working... 还有一个失败的关系机率比…
[03:25.36]zero to none. 是零到没有帮助的
[03:28.96]But this never was a relationship. 但这从未是一种关系啊
[04:15.00]（距情人节只剩一天）
[04:25.44]Come on! 拜托！
[04:29.00]Stupid fake⁵ holyday. 愚蠢的假节日
[04:29.08]I know! It's just a day of pressure, isn't it? 我知道！只是个有压力的一天 不是吗？
[04:33.80]I mean, even if you're in a relationship, which I'm not... 我是说， 即使你是 处在一种关系里，还好我没有…